Wednesday, February 25, 2015

And Now a Word From Our Sponsors

Donut: Sponsors, like AA meetings?

Salem: That means Alcoholics Always, right?

Shemo: Are you really just making an entry of us talking?

Realta: Leave him alone, all you guys just want read about yourselves anyway.

Salem: Who the hell are you? Tits or gtfo.

She's one of the characters that hasn't been introduced yet. Rani's dating her.

Salem: Did I say tits or gtfo? I meant nice to meet you ma'am.

Malina: Ahem, I have tits, too.

Salem: Show 'em or shut it.

Malina: I really don't know why you haven't written me out yet.

Ara: A better question would be why he wrote you in.

Donut: Oh snap, cat fight.

Salem: I changed my mind about Malina. If strawberry shortbitch doesn't like her than she can't be all bad.

Can we go one entry without the petty infighting?

Sky: They could, but would anyone read it?

Aethon: Is anyone reading it now?

Spoiler alert: I'm setting you on fire next entry.

Captain: Can you guys just shut up so he can quit making excuses and get with the story.

Ameldi: Like the part where I beat the hell out of Ara.

Thanks for the spoiler.

Salem: Do you rip her clothes off?

Ameldi: I take requests.

Salem: I like this one. She can stay.

The new characters are all villains. The cast of hero is too extensive.

Salem: Which is why need to kill some bitches. Or just the one bitch.

Ara: Fuck you and the bottle you rode in on.

Language, I didn't post a warning for this one.

Aethon: Again, in order for someone to be offended they would actually have to read this. And that's reason enough for offense.

Shemo: I call bullshit. You love to offend people.

Malina: Did you date her, too?

Realta: Back off, bitch.

Donut: This is great stuff.

Aethon: Especially the part where you know it's all going to fall back on Rani.

Ara: Can we talk about the fact that he only updated twice last year and so far this year he's just been feeding us lazy bullshit.

Shemo: He's been writing it out; just not posting. That has to count for something.

Aethon: Not if he changes directions and rewrites twenty times and then abandons it.


Aethon: Just because I'm the teapot doesn't mean your kettle isn't black.

Donut: Bowchicka?

Realta: I'm so confused. Why did you bring me into this story in progress?

Because life is in progress. You can't always start at the beginning.

Malina: That makes no sense. Of course you start at the beginning.

Amedli: She has a point. More people would know what's going on if you gave us some backstory.

I'm working on it, it's kinda hard to give a backstory to an anti-fan fiction based on years of inside jokes and collaborative stories. Rani has been around since you were hitting me up for gum in high school.

Salem: Wait, Ameldi is a real person and I haven't heard about her?!

Everyone here is based on someone I know. You know that.

Salem: I demand you send me pictures of her.

Go to bed Sally, you're drunk.

Shemo: Says the guy narrating a conversation between his imaginary friends based on his real friends.

Malina: I wouldn't say friends, exactly.

Realta: Baby, who is Malina and when can I kill her?

Salem: I like this one. You should keep her.

Sky: I'd like to point out that I've written four books since he started this project. Four. You can read them while you're waiting for him to update.

She has a point there.

Sky: If I'm stuck in this story, I might as well promote mine.

Fair enough. Everyone should pick up Blue Sky Days and the Storm books that Marie Landry has produced. Oh and Salem, she put out some erotica that may interest you.

Salem: You had me at put out.

I've wasted way too much time on this and have too few brain cells remaining to continue. Aethon, gear up for the fight of your life when I get around to typing out the next part.